Rihanna and the Middle East

We've been hearing a lot about Rihanna these days. I've seen parts of her recent interview with ABC's Diane SawyerDiane Sawyer. When asked about why she returned to Chris Brown after the incident, Rihanna said that it's normal for a battered woman to return to her abusive partner. Many victims of domestic violence would probably agree with Rihanna. Robin Givens, the ex-wife of Mike TysonMike Tyson, has talked about this in the past. People tend to ask, "Why does a woman stay with a guy who hits her?" Denise Brown, the sister of Nicole Brown (OJ Simpson's deceased wife), believes that the question should instead be, "Why does a guy hit his partner?"

But Larry KingLarry King once related a conversation he had with a psychologist, who said: "If a guy comes home to his wife, and she hits him with a lamp. And this keeps happenening as the guy keeps coming home to his wife, who's the crazy one?" Nearly every woman who has been abused believes - at first - that she can change her abusive partner. And that's why she stays with him. After all, he is not always violent. Sometimes - in fact, most of the time - he is really sweet and romantic. He just has issues, and these issues can be dealt with by standing by him. He had a difficult childhood. It's not really his fault. As Rihanna told Diane Sawyer, "Love is blind."

Rihanna understands now that the correct course of action, for any woman who has been hit, is to leave. Don't stay. Don't try to change him. Just leave. I see parallels with America's foreign policy in the Middle East. Since 9/11, the United States has paid a lot of attention to the region that Condoleezza RiceCondoleezza Rice used to refer to as the "Broader Middle East," a region that stretches from Morocco to Pakistan. I think that America has been acting like a battered woman. She got hit by the Middle East on 9/11. And she should have just left the Middle East. But love is blind. America's love for fossil fuels has blinded her so completely that she can't see what time it is -- it's time to leave.

America can't change the Middle East any more than Rihanna can change Chris Brown. Chris Brown experienced domestic abuse as a child, and so this is cyclical. But only he can break the cycle. Only Chris Brown can change Chris Brown. Not Rihanna. The Middle East has experienced conflict for centuries. It is cyclical as well. Only the people of that region can break the cycle by dealing with their issues. Only the Middle East can change the Middle East. Not America. America needs to get like Rihanna, and disengage, disengage, disengage. If you stay with the guy, you aren't helping him. And if you stay in the Middle East, you're not helping it. As Oprah once said, "He will hit you again." If America does not militarily disengage from the Middle East, it could get hit again. The lessons of domestic violence should be applied to US foreign policy.