Neanderthals did Koochie Koo with humans

In what could be a shocking find by any standards, genomic studies have revealed that humans did indeed do the Neanderthals.

Geneticist Dr. Hammerschmidst, who has been studying the genomes taken from the bones of Neanderthals and modern humans is set to publish a study that sex was common between the two species. New evidence unearthed by the renowned genesist suggests that this relationship might have been the cause of the sudden extinction of the Neanderthals.

“This was the time when human dudes were really desperate. Some human females were acting pricy and used to spend more time in shopping malls than in bed. That was when humans were exposed to these angels who were just what the doctor ordered. It was a match made in heaven and very soon the stork came visiting,” the doc said explaining the sequence of events.

The doctor has infact managed to locate the descendent of one such human-neandertal association. This man in question is none other than the interior minister of Pakistan Rehman MalikRehman Malik. “We had always suspected him. His IQ was in the negative and his looks also added to the suspicion. When we compared his DNA with the one extracted from the neandertahl bones, it was a near perfect match. In fact we found that his IQ was low even for a neanderthal. This anomaly can be attributed a progressive decline in the quality of genes transferred over generations,” the doc said.

Dr. Hammerschmidst’s paper claims that a set of Neanderthals had migrated to what is now Pakistan after they were driven out of Europe by angry humans.