Humped! the local whale.

In recent news, my wife was humped by my neighbor. I was whale watching off the coast of long beach when I received a text message from [name and address withheld] that he was banging my wife, of 17 years. I thought it was a joke until I received a picture message immediately after, it was a picture of her sucking his d**k. I was heart broken, she never gave me B***jobs! How did this all start you may ask? Well, to be honest I'm not sure. The week before, [name and address withheld] had given me whale watching tickets for a boat ride which is a great gesture for a marinebiologist like me! I often spend my weekends on the seas searching for rare plankton and algie. And when the day is done, I drive home to my victorian style home off the coast. I go home to an already warm bed, you know it often smells funny too. Anyways, I slip into a warm bed just before my wife gets out of the shower and drift off into sleep, dreaming of underwater adventures. Sometimes I ask for sex, but she says she's tired and just had a work-out. Anyways our neighbor is a great guy he comes over and checks on our plants almost everyday, it's nice to know he cares. In fact, one day, I found him UNDER our bed! HAHA! He was naked too! He said he was looking for a Neogene plant, not sure I've ever heard that species, but I guess they glow in the dark and live under beds. but the BEST part of this was Sarah was sleeping in bed all wrapped up in our covers, she didn't even know! I can't believe she was still asleep at 2 in the afternoon! crazy days! But yes that afternoon, [name and address withheld] came over and gave me this whale watching ticket. I took it today and went out to watch the whales. and that's when I got a picture of him getting a b**wjob and they we're making fun of me.

Anyways moral of the story... DON'T TRUST ANYONE. NOT EVEN YOUR NIEGHBOR. AND IF HE'S CHECKING ON THE PLANTS... HE'S FUCKING YOUR WOMAN

the end.