La Liga predictions for 2009-2010 season

La Liga is an awesome league to watch because most of the teams primarily focus more on offense. Plenty of goals will be scored. Here is one through twenty from the eyes of a-hol.

1. Barcelona. The only reason I pick Barcelona over Real Madrid is that Puyol guarded Christiano RonaldoRonaldo rather easily in last season's Champion League final. When they play head-to-head, this matchup in favor of Barcelona be the advantage.

2. Real Madrid. They signed plenty of people and things are going well for Real Madrid right now. However, too many players need to adjust. Wait until they go into a slump during the season and Christiano Ronaldo starts throwing tantrums. He goes into more hissy fits than a woman on her period.

3. Atletico Madrid. The only problem they had last year was at goaltender. They have addressed that problem by signing Asenjo from Valladolid. Their midfield and strikers can score as much as Barcelona and Real Madrid do.

4. Villareal. Guiseppe Rossi scores a lot of goals. Their team is stacked as well with Capdevila, Cazorla, Pires, and Senna. Do not look directly at their jerseys in HD.

5. Sevilla. Fabiano and Kanoute will keep them in most of their games.

6. Valencia. If David Silva is not injured throughout this season, then they could move up. However, when was the last time that you saw David Silva play an entire season. David Villa and Mata will be destroying teams.

7. Deportivo La Coruna. They have a solid squad. Their defense alone in this no-defense league should give them a guaranteed top 10 spot.

8. Athletic Bilbao. Fernando Llorente will continue to be a one-man wrecking crew.

9. Espanyol. RIP Jarque. Usually when tragedy hits a team, the team usually bands together to play better. Also, adding Nakamura from Celtic helps as well.

10. Racing Santander. The duo of Smolarek and Tchite shall keep them in plenty of games.

11. Getafe. Albin and Casquero are a great 1-2 punch in the midfield.

12. Malaga. Their best player's name is Adrian. All people named Adrian are overwhelmingly cooler than igloos.

13. Mallorca. Oscar Trejo scores plenty of goals. Their defense gives up plenty of goals. A fun team to watch.

14. Vallodolid. Getting Manucho from Manchester United will help their midfield. Losing their goalie will not help, but most of the teams in La Liga do not play defense anyway. La Liga means 'no defense' in Spanish. That seems to follow the path of their ancestors because the Spanish Armada did not have a great defense either.

15. Zaragoza. Getting Jermaine PennantJermaine Pennant from Liverpool will keep this team out of relegation.

16. Sporting de Gijon. Having Bilic should keep them out of relegation.

17. Osasuna. Just because they have a player on their team named Dady, I will keep them out of relegation. Who's your daddy?

18. Almeria. Real Madrid bought out the contract of Negredo, who scored 18 goals for Almeria last year. Real Madrid will now pay Negredo five million pounds just to sit the bench and to also watch Almeria plunge into the relegation zone.

19. Tenerife. This team will be getting destroyed. They may lose every game by at least 2 goals.

20. Xerez. This team is horrible. Enjoy La Liga this year.

To all the fans of La Liga, stop being racist at games. Spaniards have no reason to be racist towards anyone else. The country has not been great for over 500 years. About the only thing that has been invented by Spain over that span of time that is great has been the castanets.