For sale!

I got humanized...

If my hope becomes a fact, I can profit or cash out...

Only I’m too hushed to be easy…

I’d be selling gently the know-how of getting up, wanting to live, advices like an old man preventing the obvious…

Only I’m too supportive to own experiences that give more than an information, IN NUMBERS, of chances of “not working out” some of people’s choices…

I’d say they challenge luck, they need emotion, or they plea to be a ‘getting over’…

I’d say all study I’ve done alone, not saying a word, and how it now, cheers me up…

I’ve been sufferer, terrible crimes at me were left behind, I’ve been depressed, dreamer, writer, activist, expressionist at all kinds, to turn out being behind and under the world’s rushes…

I went to search, met great people, used smartness to fight for life, I’ve been…

Silent.

In silence, never gave up of my equal’s feelings, never got lazy on facts for them being at me too ruff, too many!..., never stopped the interest in learning, disseminating the learns, or died…

I’ve been suicidal, taken from home, hurt in streets of the “nobody sees anything”, back to home, and facing alone the hard ‘getting over’ production.

Never sold any or will…

I’ve got a pianist problem (not being one, but suddenly playing it), a book wisher (never published, but with hundreds or thousands written), a painting inappropriate (on pencils and poor sheets), a quietness evolution, and severe fear from knowing that nothing gets punished, recognized as fight for life, or seeing ahead any fairness to me.

I’d sell this state of transformation of ‘what’s happened’, what makes you cry very very hurt, or… I’d label it as a place I’ll call “The Brain Paradise”.

I’d bake! A manual of surviving the horror, the “how to get over” topic in it’s pages, and merchandise all as a professional at publicity.

Or…

I’d accept giving! To my other, the right I’ve never had!

To choose doing good to someone or doing bad, and nothing happening after the act.

Than I discovered that NOT A SINGLE SOUL to whom by me, was given that option, chose to do me something good.

These words speak for themselves.

Now, choose different.

I’m fighting not to die.