When the Royal Wedding occurred last year, everyone was very happy
Because that was the first time in a long time in which people thought of the UK as not being crappy.
To become royalty, one must strike when the cauldron is hot.
For a while, I didn't think anyone was going to marry Prince William because of his balding spot.
Her stardom cannot be denied by even a simpleton,
Which is why I'm surprised nobody else has ever dedicated a poem to Princess Kate Middleton.
I do have plenty of concern about Princess Kate
Because the tabloids were wrong for saying that she was overweight.
Don't believe the hype. Stay in a good mood by eating plenty of food.
Also, tell the tabloids that they are a bunch of prudes.
Don't allow for them to make anorexia one of your long-term goals.
You will always look the best in the Royal Palace; the only other women there are the Queen and Princess Camilla Bowles.
It was also wrong for the New Republic to photoshop a cover of you with messed up teeth and display it everywhere.
Out of all of this you could become an influence for Great Britain to have better dental care.