Deconstructing Romney: Who is he?

6.15.12--A Slightly Satirical Slant

I always say politicians have dual personalities. For some, triple or quadruple is more like it. Their goal is to get elected and in order to do so, they feel the need to give the people want they want, or rather, what they want to hear.

There is the private person and the public persona. So does this invite duplicity, dishonesty, subterfuge? Call it what you like, most do a lot or a little of it. The trick is to strike a balance and keep it from straying into Jekyll and Hyde macabre territory. Mitt Romney seems to have deep difficulty mastering the dual persona and so he comes of as fake, trying too hard and appearing painfully uncomfortable in his own skin.

Whether you like Presidents Obama, Ronald Reagan, Bill Clinton or George W Bush's policies or not, you have to admit they are likeable. Maybe it's because they are comfortable in their skin. Obama and Clinton are incredible charmers, and ooze charisma. Bush is that regular guy next door, unassuming, with none of that intellectual intimidation which can keep people at arm's length. So was Reagan. They look authentic: What you see is what you get.

With Romney, it's the exact opposite. There is this mysterious aura he exudes, like there is so much more behind the coiffed hair and awkward smile that we don't know of and will never find out. Who is he, really? His "handlers" tried to change his look by taking him out of formal stiff, suits into casual jeans and rolled up workshirts. The problem here is the "mommy" jeans are neatly pressed into creases and the blue collar "work shirt" is not so "blue," for it is of the expensive ilk. Like I jokingly say, Romney is ordinary "Sears catalog" working man at the bottom and a Brook Brothers Bain Capitalist from the waist up.

Everyone knows he is an extremely wealthy man so trying hard to look working class by slightly dressing down, smacks of too much duplicity. The kind that voters can spot a mile away. Being himself might be more authentic.

We know of his professional accomplishments. His business ties, his offshore accounts, his governorship. We know he is a family man who seems to love his wife of many years. He has married only one woman, so he gets an A-plus for family values--something high on the list of ultra-conservatives.

Romney has all this going for him, yet I feel like I do not know who he is. The core of the man is hidden so deep, fossils excavation equipment will be needed to find his personality, to find what makes him tick. Or not, depending on what angle you're at.

What is behind that smooth yet awkward facade? I know that sounds like an oxymoron but therein lies the sum of Mitt. He looks like a walking contradiction. I think it is this mystery that turns voters off, make them wary. He is a religious man but because he is not very open about that part of his life, the mystery mounts. To add to the unknown, his religion is not the "popular" Christianity of many conservatives. One pastor even called Mormonism a cult, and not many Republicans chewed him out for it.

Sometimes I wonder what it is that has him wound so tightly. Does he have a sex dungeon in his basement and is terrified it will get out? Does he like cross-dressing in the privacy of his--I'm sure, expansive closets at home? Is he Rick James type of freaky with the wife.? Does he enjoy crocheting in his spare time but thinks we won't understand?

What is it, Mitt? I know it is not just being shy or socially awkward, for having the guts as a teenager to hold down a fellow classmate and cut off his hair takes a certain type of --dare I say it--"ballsy" arrogance. So we know self-confidence is certainly not lacking in that arena. He had it quite early in life, didn't he?

So again, what is it about Mitt?

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