All About Gay

Today I stand before you as a gay man.

I have no intentions of saying that I am a proud gay man. Because the truth is, I am not proud at all. And why should I? Being proud means you think your stature is above others in some way, and honestly I don't think of myself as having such. The good side of pride on the other hand, lets you greatly enjoy the things you have done in your life. Still, I cannot be proud for something that I have no control of. We can be proud of our achievements and our accomplishments since we have worked hard for them. Be proud of an award. Be proud of your work. But being gay is not something you accomplish. It is not something you aspire to. You don't work hard to be gay. It just happens naturally. So I am not going to say I am proud, rather I embrace my being gay because it is part of who I am.

I speak for myself and I certainly cannot speak for the entire homosexual populace. But my emotions right now belong to that of a typical gay man who is living a typical gay life. And I am sure one or two, if not all like me, have had some of these sentiments before.

I bet every one of you has some relative, a family member or a friend who is openly gay. If you think you have none, think again. You just may not be aware of it. And if you do know somebody who's gay, please avoid asking them the age old question: when did you realize you're gay? I've lost count on how many times I've heard and answered this in the past. Truth is, no one really knows the answer. Not even us. There is no exact time and date of such realization because at the back of our minds, we have always known that we are different from everyone else. Being gay is as natural; it is a product of both genetic and social factors. It is a product of nature and nurture.

Also when you call a gay person, please call him using his or real, parent-given, legal name, or his nickname would be enough. Though sometimes we encounter, calling us hoy bakla is not proper. It is not that we are ashamed of who we are and our sexual preference. Yes we are baklas but we have people names, you know. The term bakla, although slowly losing its negative connotation in society is rather vague and is improper to use especially when the purpose is to identify whom you're speaking with. Besides, we don't call the attention of straight people by calling out their sexual preference. We don't say hoy straight! , which is very impolite. Our parents gave us our names for such purposes.

I love wearing make-up. I love clothes. I love fashion and everything that comes with it. Personally, it is just who I am. I prefer to show the world my sense of self through fashion. And there is nothing wrong with that. A small part in all of us wants to express our self-identity through the image that we project to other people. And we are no exception to that rule.

I want to say that not all gays showcase their colorful personas. Well, not all gays have colorful personas to begin with. Although some of us do adore the Broadway. Some do ballet and some do crochet. But come to think of it, such activities are not restricted to any gender. No law prohibits a specific gender from doing them. And while we are patron of the arts and theatre, a fair number of us also watch sports. We are into like motorsport and boxing. Most of us lift weights and do all kinds of macho stuff. Some of us throw ball better than most straight guys out there. Much like not all straight guys prefer to play ball, some of us also don't usually do the things that are stereotypical gay.

What I'm trying to say is that we are not different like you. We are living in the extremes and the in-betweens much like everybody else. That is because we are also humans.

I would like to say that there is more to a gay person than just sex. Contrary to popular belief, we do not have sex every minute we're alone with each other. That is absurd. We don't get some all the time. However, it would be improper for me to say that all gays are born saints or immaculate. We are not. We are humans and we have human urges as well. Everyone has. And just like everybody, we act towards these biological urges. Our sexual drive is the same as everybody else's. On a few occasions, some of these urges are manifested verbally. You might have classified them as your typical parloristang bading who has nothing else on his mind but how many men he can hada (sex with a guy) and book in one night. I am not condemning them by the way. If that's how they want to live their lives, they have every right to do so. But bear in mind those they are but a small subset of the general population of our community. We have brains, we think. We have hearts, emotions. Before you over generalize gay people on being immoral, ask yourself if the heterosexual rapist is any better than whom you condemn. Better yet, get a mirror and take a hard look on yourself. In any case, no one has the right to condemn another human being as immoral to begin with.

Today I come before all of you to say that, as you can see, we are not at all special people. We are living in the same world just like everyone. We face the same problems like a normal people and learn from the mistakes we have committed in the past. And I would like to inform you, whether you like it or not, we are here and we intend to stay who we are. We are not here to recruit your children nor put our sexual orientation above others. We are not an extraordinary breed of men and women nor do we seek special treatment. We are just as normal as everyone else. What we want is to be treated as a normal and functioning part of your society, of our society.

I am normal. I am human.

I am gay.